If you ask me, some of the best videos on the internet are the ones that totally invade people’s privacy and post shots of them being completely silly as they wake up from anesthesia.
These 16 people are owning those experiences and sharing them by their own choice – and I can’t decide if it’s making me more or less excited for the next time I end up under the knife.
16. Open-mouth gawking.
I have the perfect story for this.
So, at 20 I had a pretty big drug and drink problem. This meant being in hospital a few times a month for my behaviour, overdose, or people worrying about my using.
One night I was bought in, and I got a nurse assigned to me that consistently had issues with me. To be fair, I was high and in the wrong almost every time we did have issues, but her attitude didn’t help.
On this night I heard the normal speech from her, about how I was a pretty young girl who was better than this lifestyle, and while she was giving this speech she was trying to take my blood. She must have stabbed that needle in 5+ times at great pain before I took the needle from her hand, and inserted it myself on the first try. She was open mouth gawking at me, while I was handing the drip to connect it.
The next day when I was sober, one of the other nurses said the story had gone around the hospital overnight, and it made the top ten strangest things to happen that month.
Six years later, I’m three years clean and sober with a job in healthcare, using my vein finding skills for good use.
15. As one does.
Not my story, but one of the patients I’ve worked with. He was an old man with severe dementia. One day he ended up missing. They couldn’t find him anywhere.
It was the middle of winter so of course we were worried the old man would freeze to death. After 2 hours he walks into the ward completely soaked and muddy with a huge grin on his face.
When we asked him where he was, he simply responded with: “I went sleigh riding.”
14. The saddest story of all.
I had my 1st open heart surgery when I was about 10 hours old.
And I’m currently on day 228 since I was admitted into the hospital. I’m waiting for a heart/bilateral lung transplant. I’m the 1st heart/bilateral lung transplant patient that’s been listed in Illinois with a hospital in Illinois in about 13 years. And I’m the very 1st heart/bilateral lung transplant patient with Northwestern & Childrens in Chicago. And children’s in Chicago is where Ive had all my open heart surgeries and was seen till I was about 22 years old.
I’ve been sick my entire life. I’ve had over 20 surgeries, but this is by far the hardest thing I’ve lived through medically.
In April I was a part of a news story (did the interview from my hospital bed)in Chicago about transplant during a pandemic and a few weeks ago we found out that that News story is nominated for an Emmy.
About 2 months ago we found out my Mom had Covid. Tomorrow will be a month since she died. And because of my health state, I can’t leave the hospital… so I had to watch my moms funeral over zoom that my brother in law set up.
13. An absolute mutiny.
Back in the days before cable, my husband made me bring in a VCR and hooked it up to the in-room tv so he could watch movies.
The hospital administrators put up a big stink, but couldn’t point to any reason why this wasn’t allowed, so they let him keep it.
Several other patients followed suit.
12. A long and weird story.
I had given birth to my third child. Post birth, the nurse intermittently checked on me, pressed my abdomen to check bleeding. I wasn’t feeling great, but the birth was uncomplicated and I’m a tough cookie, so I agreed that my husband should go get the other kids to meet their new brother. We lived less than a mile from the hospital.
While he was gone, the nurse expressed concern. Husband came back with the kids and right after the first family pic, I started throwing up.
The pic came out great. But my face is white as a sheet.
Nurse came back in, saw my face, told my husband to take the kids to the cafeteria. She pressed on my abdomen and the blood shot out my vagina, splattered my socked feet, and hit the wall beyond my bed.
I was rushed into emergency surgery. I had an epidural, so anesthesia only gave me a little drug to knock me out.
Here’s the weirdest thing: I woke up during surgery. I heard the doc say, “OMG! I can’t find the source of this intense bleeding! Get blood. OH. Here it is. I must’ve cut her. Patient is alert.”
And I was knocked out again.
Next day, doc came to see me. He told me he had to stitch my cervix. I told him I heard he said he must’ve cut me. He denied. Then I realized he was worried about malpractice. So I said, “Doc, I’m not going to sue you. But it’s just that I want one more kid after this. Will I be able to?” And he sighed relief and assured me Yes.
Long story, but it is kinda weird.
11. Bad everything.
I full fist punched a nurse trying to sedate me.
Bad night, bad week, bad everything. Out of nowhere I just downed a bottle of depressants while chatting with my friend. No idea why besides “man I don’t wanna wake up tomorrow”. They depress your breathing with only a few, so with maybe 70, you get the picture.
I overdosed, obviously. And proceeded to black out. Then I guess I passed out.
I woke up to paramedics, blacked out again, woke up in a grey room with a man trying to stab something into me. I felt sick and confused and scared, I didn’t know what was going on. Soooo I nailed the dude in the face.
I woke up again strapped to the bed.
After a few hours some of the drugs were out of my system and I apologized profusely. Still feel so bad about it.
10. That’s really something.
My best friend spent a week in the hospital because her water broke + was having contractions 1.5 months before her due date. While she was there her husband brought his WHOLE pc setup so he could play games while he was there with her, I’m talking fancy keyboard, headset and all the other s*%t.
He’d be playing his games when the nurses or dr would come in and ask her questions, he’d be talking + yelling at whoever he was playing while me and her family visited. He’s most likely the reason she had their baby preterm bc of all of the stress he caused.
He didn’t have a job and didn’t seem to care if he did or not. To this day I cannot believe what I witnessed and don’t understand how she could still be with him. I understand being at the hospital forever sucks but like wtf?!?!
9. A glorious time.
Not me but my 4 year-old son. He had to stay overnight for reasons I’ve forgotten. Somehow it didn’t make it to his chart that he was ADHD and was on Ritalin. I leave and they don’t medicate him. He was mobile, wired and unsupervised. Yee haw!
I found out the next morning that they lost him and panicked. He’d made it up several floors flushed his pajama top down the toilet for reasons. He then managed to find a very senile old man and climbed in bed with him. When they finally found him he was watching the guy’s tv and eating his ice cream.
They called me to come and get him early. The staff looked like they had seen some s*%t. Patrick, however, had had a glorious time. He never would tell me why he flushed his pjs, though.
8. Lost his marbles.
Two things, same visit…
Long story short, I’d lost my marbles. I had no idea who I was, or what was going on. Knew I was in a hospital, that was it.
The nurses needed me to lift my legs for something. Don’t remember what. So, in my insane state, I followed their instructions to the letter – I lifted my legs and had them all the way back behind my head. Displaying my naked bottom to the whole ER. I am a male and not flexible. My wife is wondering where that flexibility came from. I couldn’t do it again if I tried with help.
The second was that I had a catheter in. But I was insane. I needed to go to the bathroom, or so I thought. I kept trying to get up to go. Normally that set off the weight alarm and a nurse came in. But one time she didn’t. And I got the catheter all tangled up. Talk about tugging on the wrong places! I couldn’t move, couldn’t call for help, couldn’t get untangled. Thankfully the nurse finally came in or I might have seriously hurt myself.
7. Help with math.
I went to the ER for breathing treatments. They wanted to admit me because I had pneumonia. I had an exam the next morning so argued about being admitted.
Dr emailed my professor. Was admitted and there fir a little more than a week. I was doing all my assignments while there. I absolutely suck at math. So buzzed the nurse and asked for homework help.
She was stumped. She got a neuro surgeon to come help me.
6. A terrible nightmare.
Woke up after major surgery on a shoulder, and lay in bed while listening to the person I shared the room with having a nigthmare rigth of a truly horrid dimensjon.
Poor soul screamed and wailed like someone was murdering them slowly with a rusty & jagged knife
5. Like a horror movie.
Tore out my IV and a pic line in my neck. The Dr.s and nurses got to me just as I was going for the drain tube coming out of my head, after brain surgery.
Blood was spraying around the room from the hole where the pic line was, and I was fighting them, calling them every name in the book. They ended up strapping me to the bed for my own safety.
Turns out, I had a bad reaction to the anesthesia they used.
4. A full-body flush.
I was so scared of an operation that I flushed extremely. My body was red everywhere. Because of this my body temperature went up and was above the allowed temperature to operate. My surgeon was very concerned and was thinking about not operating me.
At the end I told him that it was because of my anxiety and my arm was already numbed anyway. I was glad when that operation was over.
3. So sorry.
Had a bug out reaction to anesthesia, came to being restrained screaming they gave me covid during surgery….
Sorry bout that
2. They made him wait.
Had my appendix out in 6th grade. Parents weren’t with me at one point in the hospital. I had to go to the bathroom….bad! Hit the nurse button. Told her I had to go really bad. Said she would be there soon. 15 minutes go by and I’m about to s*%t my pants.
Called her again…still not showing up. Finally decided to get up myself and unplug the IV machine and all that. Get halfway to the bathroom and couldn’t hold it anymore. Completely filled my whitey tighties with some terrible diarrhea.
Waddle my way to the bathroom like “what the hell am I supposed to do now?” Still no sign of the nurse and I was too embarrassed to admit what happened. Ended up throwing my very soiled underwear in the bathroom trashcan and got myself cleaned up. Eventually got back to bed and called my mom to bring me new underwear.
I seriously feel bad for whoever had to take out that trash. But I never did have to tell anyone what happened.
1. Each and every day.
I was in hospital for 30 days and had 30 Long Chili Cheese Burgers from BK. On the first day while still dizzy from surgery (home accident, cut my leg badly, 100+ stitches) some visiting friend brought me one.
I must have told my parents, my back-then GF and everybody else how good that burger was. After that, everybody brought me one. I shared them with the staff, other patients.. But I had one myself, each day.
Y’all, I’ve got to get myself into more recovery rooms. So much potential for humor!
Have you ever said something funny while totally out of it? Have you witnessed someone else say something too funny not to share? Tell us about it in the comments!