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18 People Confess the Dumbest Thing They’ve Ever Believed

Even the smartest people have to admit that, at one time or another, they’ve bought into a lie. Whether it was told to them on purpose, as a joke, or they went hook, line, and sinker for something more sinister, it honestly happens to all of us.

If you don’t believe me, just check out these 18 people ready to confess their most gullible moments.

18. Wait, they don’t?

I was convinced that Greeks still worshipped Zeus and other gods for awhile after I heard the word Greek Orthodox Church as a kid.

17. Mom was definitely a witch.

Here’s the list so far:

• I firmly believed from ages 3 to 8 that every single night, little elves would march around my bed until morning and that if I dangled my foot off the bed, they would eat my toes.

• My mum told me that midnight was the witching hour so if I didn’t go to sleep by then, I would get kidnapped by witches.

• My mum also told me that if I didn’t clean my room, snakes would raid my room because they were attracted to the mess.

• I also thought that a witch stood behind my bed each night and if any bit of hair strayed from my pillow, she would take a piece for her spells.

As you can imagine, I didn’t sleep very well as a child.

16. They do have snacks and refrigerators…

I was convinced that Greeks still worshipped Zeus and other gods for awhile after I heard the word Greek Orthodox Church as a kid.

15. There’s just one problem.

I was once told that (British TV presenter) Jeremy Beadle’s hand had such small fingers because of a condition (poland syndrome) that meant he had to have his fingers replaced, and that his fingers were, in fact, pigs toes.

For years, this was a piece of obscure general knowledge that I would break out when i felt the need to display the breadth of my weird knowledge.

And it went down really well until the days someone finally said “Don’t pigs have hooves?”

i don’t know that I have ever experienced such a moment of butt-clenchingly cringey embarrassment.

14. Dads are the best.

My dad is bald but has always had a beard (since I’ve known him, anyway). He was also a serviceman.

He used to tell me that the reason he was bald was that he stood on a landmine which blew the hair off the top of his head and it slipped round to give him the beard instead.

As a child I was just like “yep, makes sense. Hair not on head, hair in chin. That’s gravity for ya”.

He also told me that a scar on his leg was from a gunshot wound. Twenty years later I got a bug bite on my leg, that got infected (sorry, hope you’re not eating) and left a perfectly round scar in the same place as his. I commented on how much my bug bite scar looked like his gunshot wound scar and he said “what? Is that what I told you? No, this was a bug bite that got infected.”

Ah, dads.

13. A bad lot.

That being named Johnny was a sin…

There’s a part of the song The Devil went down to Georgia that goes “my names Johnny and it might be a sin, but I’ll take your bet” I instantly associated the name with being a sin not making bets with the devil.

This made me think kids named Johnny were sons of Devil worshippers.

I was a very dumb kid.

12. I mean. She’s not wrong.

I thought Churchill was an architect because when I was little my mum told me he was one of the ‘architects of Israel’.

11. The laugh that keeps on giving.

That WD40 meant windows down, 40mph

Someone told me that in middle school as a joke and I took it literally until I was a senior.

10. More than kinda.

When I was little, I genuinely believed the Telly Tubbies were evil and that if I didn’t watch them on TV every night (even though I hated the show) that they would come and get me.

To be fair though they’re kind of creepy.

9. He could have left something. Ha!

I grew up in a Jewish household but was aware of the whole Christmas thing. It was my understanding that Santa would go around bringing gifts to kids if they left out a plate of cookies and some milk for him. Seemed easy enough!

‘Twas the night before Christmas and I left the perfect food arrangement out for Santa, thinking in spite of my religious beliefs, he might leave me a gift in exchange for the snacks. When I awoke the next morning, the cookies and milk were gone but no present was left. I was a FURIOUS. How dare this jolly fat man come into my whole, steal my food and not leave anything in return! I spent years complaining about it and would curse the mans name if I saw him.

Of course years later my dad admitted that he had eaten everything. Thanks dad.

8. So many people believe this!

That dark meat and white meat come from 2 different birds.

I was 12 when they asked me, as they did each year at Thanksgiving, which kind of meat I wanted. That year, I said, “Dark meat, please…. but I feel bad I’m the only one who really eats it and you always have to get an entire second Turkey just for me.”

I’m still teased about it to this day… at 46 years old.

7. Bless his heart.

I used to be so confused about the amount of time it would take to make movies because I was convinced they did it all in chronological order and when they did flashbacks to childhood, I was like “wow those actors are so committed” 😂 or I would think it must take a long time for their hair to grow or change in anyway and never considered it could be a wig lol

6. Just wait until WWIII.

As a kid, I thought that the ‘World Wars’ were like battle royales where there were no alliances, no surrenders, and just pure bloody violence between every country on Earth (e.g. I thought every country fought all of its neighbours simultaneously)

5. How long did this go on?

I am from a Muslim country. There are Mosques everywhere, so we always hear Ezan/Azan (Call to prayer)

I used to believe that Allah(God) was reciting the Ezan…

So I was like; I can’t understand how we can’t know what God is like, what he looks like, and that we can only meet him in the afterlife. Just trap him down when he leaves the mosque after he finished reciting the Ezan?????

4. Innocence can be horrifying.

When I was ~6 I watched a movie (King Kong?) and a scene with a bunch of black folks emerging from the mud appeared and I got a bit spooked by it.

A bit later, I was at McDonalds with my parents and I saw a black family walk in. Thank god my parents are deaf or I would’ve asked, out loud, “why are the mud people here?”

Mum thought I was racist but I was just a bit inexperienced lol

3. That is hilarious…and slightly concerning.

My father and I used to mess with my sister as she was growing up, when she saw an orange tree for the first time the oranges were unripe and very green, we then told her that all of the citrus fruits came from the same tree, and depending on when you picked them, that was the fruit you got.

They started as Limes, then ripened into Lemons, which would grow into Oranges, and then if left too long would grow into Grapefruits. She graduated with honors from a major state university this year.

We found out that she still believed this during our family trip to Mexico last spring (2019) when we had to break the news to her.

2. Sounds plausible.

Someone convinced me for like, 5 seconds that unicorns were real, they just lost their horns through evolution and now they are plain old horses.

1. I mean it makes sense.

I thought sugar grew in sugar caves, similar to salt caves. I believed that sugar crystals (like rock candy) just grew in caves and there were parts of the world with beautiful crystallised sugar caves.

I was 25 years old when I brought it up in conversation with my fiance. I tried to prove to him they were real and it was when I reached my 4th page on Google, I realised my whole world was a lie.

I’m not a terribly gullible person, but some of these would have been hard to refute!

What’s the silliest thing you’ve ever bought? Confessions in the comments!