Man Asks if He’s Wrong for Saying His Relationship With His Son Is More Important Than His Brother’s With His Daughter

Call me crazy, but isn’t every parent supposed to think that their relationship with their kid(s) is the most important thing in the world?


So is this guy a jerk for what he said to his brother?

Check out his story below and see what you think.

AITA for saying that my relationship with my son is more important than my brother’s relationship with his daughter?

“My (43M) brother (43M) has a difficult relationship with his daughter (25). His wife comes from a conservative christian church, and when they got married after he got her pregnant, he pretty much drank their flavor-aid.

Lo and behold when she’s 17 his daughter comes out as a l**bian. This was an awkward situation to say the least, and it ended up with her living with our parents for the rest of high school, and them paying for her college. I tried to be a safe space for her, because she’s a great kid with a bright future ahead of her and her now-fiance is basically already my other niece.

In the past two years, he and his wife have tried to reconnect with her. They’ve been attending family therapy, and seem to have made some progress in getting over their dumb fairy tale hangups over her being gay.

A year and a half ago my son (16) also came out. My wife and I told him straightaway that our lives are better because he’s in them, and that who he loves will only ever matter to us as far as making sure that the person he loves makes him happy.

My niece is getting married in six months, and she really wants her parents to be there. They, however, still say that this is a “mental block” for them. They’ve actually asked her to move the wedding back so they have more time to adjust to the idea of her being married to another woman.

When she told me this I told her straight up that that’s bulls**t and if my brother and sister-in-law are too wrapped up in their own Jesussy Christiness to watch their daughter marry the love of her life, I’ll walk her down the aisle instead.

My brother has… take issue with this. He showed up in a huff and demanded to know where I got off undermining his relationship with his daughter, why I would try to push him out, he has the right to “give” his own daughter “away,” etc. I reminded him that my son is gay, too, and I need to make sure that he knows he’s safe with us, and I’d be doing a pretty p**s-poor job of doing that if I took my braindead homophobe brother’s side over my niece’s.

Here’s where I may be the a**hole: he asked if I was saying that my relationship with my son is more important than his relationship with his daughter. I responded “yes, because I don’t have to see a f**king therapist to teach me how to love my own f**king kid.”

My wife tells me I could “probably have handled that better.” My parents are p**sed at me and say that I need to be more understanding of my brother and my sister-in-law, because they have a lot to unlearn that I don’t. My sister (51) says that I need to judge less and listen more. And apparently courtesy of my son, I’ve become a meme at the High School That My Kids Go To GSA club.


And here’s what Reddit users had to say.

This person said he’s NTA and they explained why.

Photo Credit: Reddit

Another Reddit user said that he handled this perfectly.

Photo Credit: Reddit

And this individual said this guy didn’t do anything wrong.

At all!

Photo Credit: Reddit

What do you think?

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