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There’s no one in the world who is not going to argue that marriage isn’t hard (or relationships in general aren’t hard), and adding kids into the mix makes things harder, not easier.
And when two people who have children decide to get divorced, then have to still co-parent for years to come?
Super hard.
This woman and her ex are divorced and have a four-year-old son. She was raised by a frugal mother, he was raised by what sounds like a pretty wealthy family, and this is where they butt heads.
I honestly can’t believe I’m posting this but here we go…
So, my ex gives me a generous amount of child support every month and I use about 20-30% of it maybe. I’m very good at budgeting since my mum raised me on her own and we always stuck to a strict budget.
My ex grew up being overindulged and knowing he would never have to worry about money in his lifetime, so we have different ideas of what living cheaply looks like.
She only spends around 30% of what he pays her for child support while the dad thinks the boy deserves to be spoiled more on a regular basis, since they can afford it.
He gives several examples, but the biggest one seems to be making the kid walk (with his mother) 25 minutes to and from school instead of being driven.
Recently my ex wanted to have a word with me because he didn’t like the fact that I made our son walk home from school. He wanted to know why I wouldn’t buy a car and offered me money to get one when I told him cars were expensive and I thought it was a waste of money. I told him no since I would rarely use it.
He then told me to take an uber home instead of making him walk.
Again, I told him no and he brought up all of the other ways he thought I was making our son “live cheaply”. For example: I didn’t buy him new football boots or a goal when he started getting into football (he is only 4).
I buy him “cheap” clothes, I rarely take him to eat out and if we go to a toy shop, I only ever let him get one thing and it can’t be super expensive.
She doesn’t think any of that is necessary and said she’s saving the extra money “for a rainy day” or for their son’s future.
Dad says there’s no need, he’s never going to want for money in the future, so buy him more of what he wants now.
My ex wanted to know what I was using all of the money he gave to me on if I was raising our son like this, so I explained I never used most of it but kept it in a separate account for either a rainy day or for our son.
Now he’s angry at me for making our son “live cheaply” and essentially told me to stop saving and actually give our son the things he wants now because he had already made sure our son would be fine in the future.
AITA?
Is this woman wrong? Is the dad? Reddit’s judgement might surprise you on this one!
The top comment says she’s the a$$hole, the money is for their kid, not for her to save up for whatever she considers a rainy day.
Image Credit: Reddit
While this person argues that saving is never a bad idea, especially if you have kids, because things come up.
Image Credit: Reddit
That said, the boy’s dad seems to have the future totally covered.
Image Credit: Reddit
There were plenty of people who disagreed that she was the jerk, here…but not everyone.
Image Credit: Reddit
And also, you can’t always trust the word of your ex. Just saying.
Image Credit: Reddit
Is this woman wrong? Should she buy her son a few more nice things? Tell us what you think in the comments!
